2015---THE YEAR IN DISARRAY
Well, here's another year on the highway of life that I'm sure glad I'm getting on the exit ramp offa given all of the bad deals that life dished out during them past 365. Now that it's over and done with all I gotta say is (other'n having to survive [almost] solely on the accomplishment of music, tee-vee and general funtime entertainment past) wasn't 2015 one big turdball of a year what with all of those molly-coddled "Social Justice Warrior" types becoming even bolder in their Satan-giving ways telling hard-working and definitely against-the-grain people like myself how to live and breathe. And of course I'm not forgetting the general dankness covering each and every one of us that pretty much permeates what used to pass as everyday suburban slob living now all but gone. Sad to say, those Mike Stivic types you used to see way back inna seventies have taken over with a vengeance, and just about every bit of their kumbaya kultur has metastasized itself into what used to be a rather enjoyable life of fast foods and ABBOTT AND COSTELLO reruns.
I'll tell you, the wolf ain't at the door ready to overcome you and your downhome living arrangements anymore...he's inside sitting in your favorite comfy chair in front of the idiot
Given just how sanctimonious and self-anointed our "betters" are and how they've gotten control over just about everything that once made life all the more meaningful (like tee-vee, music and other flaccid forms of beyond numbing forms of "expression") maybe I should be so irked that during the past year I have not come across not one acknowledgement or celebration or what-have-you over the 100th anniversary of the release of the D.W. Griffith extravaganza THE BIRTH OF A NATION (at least fifty years ago there were thoughtful analyses discussing the film's pros and cons without any hefty heaping sanctimony some might have expected given its er, controversy). Lord knows the high tower people will be making a big fit over next year's centennial of INTOLERANCE (in my opinion an inferior film), but that's only because it's a...well, cooler moom than its predecessor and it says things we like and all, y'know. Speaking of INTOLERANCE, I am kinda surprised that none of the Hollywood bigshot types had given thought to making a SPECIAL 100th ANNIVERSARY EDITION remake of Griffith's "sun play of the ages" only updated for current tastes with the intermingling story lines consisting of pagans struggling against Christian oppression in fourth century Rome, cruelly-treated black slaves in the antebellum South, the persecution of gay lovers in 1950's Ameriga and a trans kindergarten boy being denied the gal's room in today's saga. C'mon Schpielberg, maybe it ain't too late to get this one out to your begging public, because if they've bought into your last few films you know THEY'LL BUY INTO ANYTHING!!!
Excuse the sour turds being popped out from the anus of my mind here, for I must admit that despite the raw deals that 2015 has forced upon me the music that had come out (or at least the music I've heard) this past year was pretty hotcha even if a good portion of it was recorded long before you were even a glimmer in your milkman's eye.
ALBUM(S) OF THE YEAR!: Many great sounds have passed my lobes in '15, but the greatest of them just hadda've been THIS IS THE SONICS (a fantastic comeback from a group we've been beggin' to make a comeback for years!), WIRE (who woulda thunk they woulda been relevant in 2015?), Elliot Murphy's AQUASHOW revision and (would you believe) Rocket From The Tombs' BLACK RECORD? And (of course), anything by FADENSONNEN is fine by me!
***SINGLE OF THE YEAR!: Not too many because hey, it ain't like singles are comin' out like they were back when you prowled the top 40 rack as a kid. Best one by far---Kim Fowley's "The Trip"/"Underground Lady" on (what else?) Norton.
***BOOK OF THE YEAR (ROCK 'N ROLL DIVISION)!: I FOUGHT THE LAW by Miriam Linna and Randell Fuller, a read which, once you get through the thing, you'll think shoulda really been entitled I FOUGHT THE MOB AND THE MOB WON! Close second: SNAKES! GUILLOTINES! ELECTRIC CHAIRS!
***BOOK OF THE YEAR (SECULAR DIVISION)!: THE COMPLETE DICK TRACY VOLUME 18.
***REISSUE(S) OF THE YEAR!: Francis the Great's RAVISSANTE BABY, a deep-groove throbber from the third into the second world. Tied for second...Mahogany Brain and Red Noise.
***JAZZ ALBUM OF THE YEAR!: Weasel Walter/Chris Pitsiokos' DRAWN AND QUARTERED (One Hand)
***ARCHIVAL DIG UP OF THE YEAR! Definitely the CHINA TO MARS album on Feeding Tube, something we shoulda heard back '79 way but well, why should we complain 'long as we have ears? Also worthy of note...Gary Wilson's MUSIC FOR PIANO (also on Feeding Tube), a real avant garde wowzer that holds up after even 2000 listens---dunno about 2001 but I'll give it a try!
***OUTTA NOWHERE SURPRISE OF THE YEAR!: Doug Brockie's Infinity's THE HIGH COUNCIL OF INTERGALACTIC BLUES, a surprisingly good mid-seventies-sounding hard rock jazz blues thingie that for once doesn't remind me of any of the ginchy-gooshie guitar god grumbles of them days! Says something, and that something is probably something you DON'T want to hear, right?
***LIVE ALBUM OF THE YEAR!: THE JAZZ DESTROYERS LIVE @ JB's, KENT which you can pick up FREE onna web with the mere flick of a wrist, and you know what I mean you silly you! And as far as real and not downloadable things go, the Flamin' Groovies' IN THE USA.
***MOOM PITCHER OF THE YEAR!-ZOTZ!
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MAG(S) OF THE YEAR!: UGLY THINGS (rock division), LURID LITTLE NIGHTMARE MAKERS (secular division).
Anyway, a happy 2016 to you and yours, although we all know that just won't happen! But we can always dream now, can't we?
***THE "I WANNA HEAR MORE!" AWARD!: The Panacea Society. And while we're at it...
***FAKE OF THE YEAR???: The Panacea Society. Sure sounds legit, but somehow I get the idea that these late-sixties Velvet Underground/Seeds/Thirteenth Floor Elevators wannabes ain't exactly as vintage as I would have hoped. If they aren't legit they're still boffo in the way they revisit 1968 accomplishment, but sheeesh, whatever happened to TRUTH IN ADVERTISING?????
***POST OF THE YEAR!: Most were just snoozeville-y rec revs true, but this particular one I held near and dear to my heart. No, maybe it was this one.
***BLOG OF THE YEAR!: Once again...YOWP.
***EVENT OF THE YEAR!: Getting those little blebs of skin removed from my eyes (lids included). Painful but satisfying.
***DEATH(S) OF THE YEAR!: Kim Fowley (his passing kinda made me wish that I did take up Bill Shute's offer for him to transcribe that phone call he had with the man and run it as an interview in one of the early issues of my crudzine), Josef Vondruska (even though he died last December), Ornette Coleman and Steve Mackay (a guy's kinda guy as you'll read in my obit if you'll only click on the link like ya never do!) All votes for Holly Woodlawn may be considered.
***ATHLETE OF THE YEAR!: Tyson Fury
***FAG OF THE YEAR!: Milo Yiannopolous
***BLOG TO COMM READER OF THE YEAR!: My secret admirer in Mountain View California who keeps trafficking this blog when he/she/it should be busy working in the heart of Silicon Valley...mister/sister, you must be a devoted fan to keep tuning in alla the time like this!
Anyway, a happy 2016 to you and yours, although we all know that just won't happen! But we can always dream now, can't we?
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