Thursday, June 04, 2015

MOOM PITCHER DOUBLE FEATURE REVIEW! MY HUSTLER and BIKE BOY, directed by Andy Warhol!!!

Two classic era Andy Warhol flicks that really set the gay rights movement back a good twennysome years. MY HUSTLER takes places right in the smack dab middle of East Coast cruiserdom Fire Island* and features Warhol actor/real life Boston rock 'n roll fan Ed Hood as a wealthy queen who rings up Dial-A-Hustler for a young blonde Adonis played by Paul America. Meanwhile Hood's bitchy (female) neighbor joins him for "Water Cocktails" and begins lusting over the new acquisition sunning himself on the beach (much to Hood's ire), while a more experienced member of the Third Sex (who's done more'n his fare share of back door entertainment) pops in for some acid-tongue on the part of Hood. Soon a bet as to which of the three will get Mr. America first is up and running, though by reel two what we mostly get is the older hustler giving Paul the ins-and-outs so to speak about the biz and the heaps of money he could be making. I just hope there weren't any overachieving adolescent boys who just happened to be seeing this way back inna mid-sixties thinking that there was a whole heap of moolah to be made in male prostitution to the point where they could afford all the slot cars that they wanted 'n more!

In BIKE BOY a real-life biker with the infamous WHITE LIGHT/WHITE HEAT tattoo makes a stop in En Why See, and after taking a shower for all of the la la lads out there goes shopping for new duds and cologne (proving that most alla the store owners in the burgh must be fags--heck even Hood makes an appearance as a florist!) before meeting up with none other than Andy's Gang! The biker comes off typical toughguy with a New Yawk accent (even though he may be from Ef-El-Ay, which Mark Jenkins' brother said stood for "fucking, laying, and ass-licking" or something like that), but can he hold his own against the likes of Briget Polk and Viva??? Like I have to give you the answer?????

Both films remind me of that old comic I caught on-line where these two codgers are in an audience while some gay guy's telling jokes and flambaying it up on the stage. One of the old coots says to the other something along the lines of "I remember back when you could laugh at poofs on the street for free"! Considering that I didn't pay a penny for these flickers let's just say that it feels like old times---again!!!

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*though Don Fellman disagrees with such common knowledge, saying that once when he was a kid he and his fambly were vacationing on the famed isle and everything was normal, like no guys were coming up to him asking if he wanted to earn five dollah or anything like that! Either that or maybe them guys thought Don wasn't up to their usual Michelangelo standards or something.

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